Friday, July 24, 2009

Friday, April 3, 2009

This is What Happens When Your Friends Won't Blog:




You have to write 287 letters of apology!

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

TCHG Daily Haiku #9

Extermination.

I killed them all. Overkill.

Halo 3 feels good.

Friday, March 20, 2009

TCHG Daily Haiku #8

St. Pat's is over
And my hangover lingers
...a bump on my scrote?

:(

Thursday, March 19, 2009

TCHG Daily Haiku #7

Tons of Injuries (+)
Squads from all over the globe (=)
World Baseball Classic.

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

TCHG Daily Haiku #6

Oscar? What Oscar?
Next, Con Air, The Wicker Man...
Cage is all KNOWING!

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

TCHG Daily Haiku #5

Today I made poo.
Phone in hand, I took a pic.
Friends did not reply.

Monday, March 16, 2009

TCHG Daily Haiku #4

Fleshed out character?
A device to mollify?
Sheva Alomar.

Racist Evil 5?

This is overdue but I feel compelled to set the record straight. Lately, there's been a lot of discussion as to the racist undertones (or lack thereof) in Resident Evil 5. More often than not, the responses I've read have asked the question in a manner that presupposes the situation as a black or white dilemma. Responses to the question "is RE5 racist" generally fall into one of the two following categories: Yes, it is a racist game because there are African zombies being killed by a musclebound white man, or no, zombies are zombies and race doesn't enter into the equation. An infected is an infected.

N'Gai Croal, a respected African American video game journalist, found the trailer to be somewhat racist and stated the following:

The point isn’t that you can’t have black zombies. There was a lot of imagery in that trailer that dovetailed with classic racist imagery. What was not funny, but sort of interesting, was that there were so many gamers who could not at all see it. Like literally couldn’t see it. So how could you have a conversation with people who don’t understand what you’re talking about and think that you’re sort of seeing race where nothing exists?


On the other side of the discussion was Seth Schiesel of the New York Times who stated the following:

. . . Resident Evil 5 is not a racist game. For at least a year some black journalists have been wringing their hands about whether the game, the latest in the seminal survival-horror series, inflames racist stereotypes because it is set in Africa. The answer is no.


Prior to playing the game, I agreed with Schiesel. Now, I realize that the situation is more complicated than that. This doesn't mean, however, that I agree with Croal.

When I was in college I took a class with a man named Joseph Mwantuali who, to this day, I consider to be one of the greatest professors of all time. Mwantuali was an African man educated in France that taught French in the United States. Prof. Mwantuali taught a class I loved called "Afican Cinema." We studied Sembene Ousmene and a multitude of other African directors.

What struck me about Mwantuali was the simple approach he had to teaching complex matters. One the first day of class he showed us a film that included a lot of African tribal warriors, villagers, lions and a whole lot of other imagery that I had associated with Africa. After the film he later asked who among us thought that the film was an accurate representation of Africa. All the students in the class raised their hands. He then told us that what we had seen was an unfortunately popular American director's take on Africa.

I was mortified and embarrassed. I had allowed my preconceived notions to cloud my judgment and I had them thrust back into my face in the most polite of fashions. My faculty of reason, the tool I use every time I take in new information, had failed me. I decided to do my best to be vigilant so as not to fall victim to that sort of trap again.

The rest of the year we spent a lot of time watching films by African directors, such as Sembene Ousmene. Films like Xala, Guelwaar and Fat Kine forced me to examine my preconceived notions and showed me just how wrong I was about African culture.

After playing RE5 for upwards of 5 hours, I've come to realize that I was unknowingly and unintentionally racist in much the same way I was on my first day of class. There was no malice in my actions or thoughts (at least not in a deliberate sense), but I was still guilty of not questioning what I saw. I was guilty of letting Capcom, a company that is mainly comprised of non-Africans, perpetuate preconceived notions of African culture and aesthetics. And that right there, that's a problem.

Playing RE5, all the images were what I expected. I don't mean that I knew what was going to happen but I felt oddly comfortable with what I was seeing insofar as I easily envisioned all of it. No one will argue that parts of Africa are horribly poverty ridden and destitute, but the problem lies in how it met every preconception I had of the country. Disgustingly enough, my expectations were further confirmed when I saw the the dictator screaming into his megaphone in a foreign language with aviator glasses. It's embarrassing to admit, but yeah, he looked exactly like what I imagined a dictator in Africa to look like.

That doesn't mean that N'Gai is correct either. Being overly cautious about setting a game in Africa is racist in a way, too. Refusing to acknowledge a location or people because of historical issues is, in my opinion, racist. It's important to stay respectful and true and show the good and the bad- even if the game is fantasy. Why show both good and bad if the game is fantastic? It's not a fantastic world- it's bloody Africa and the setting is as much a star in the RE5 franchise as the characters. Everything in the game is realistically represented (save for the zombies) so let's acknowledge some of the profound issues in Africa.

RE5 is not a fair representation of a country or people which, like it or not, play a starring role in the game. The game perpetuates stereotypical representations which in certain situations boarder on racist. The refusal to show a cityscape raises a flag and shows just how outdated an stereotypical the game is.

And you know what else? I still have some white liberal guilt that makes me cringe every time I pop a tribesman in the head with a pistol while he is just equipped with a wooden spear and wooden shield. I just do. And that won't go away over night.

A lot of people will say, "well if RE5 is so racist why is Sheeva one of the main characters?" I would answer, "because Capcom knew they were going to get attacked by smart people for making a racist game, you idiot!" Sheeva is a transparent attempt at gender and racial equality. She's hot so that she can distract you from the fact that she doesn't provide an iota of cultural relevance in a game where she is lighter skinned than most of the people she is helping the the burly white man kill.

She is beautifully animated though.


Anyways, that's my rant on Racism on RE5. Will I play the game? Of course- it's a fun game. But I will be weary of everything I see and I'm going to make myself do further research into the REAL Africa in the best form available-


Far Cry 2.

Friday, March 13, 2009

TCHG Daily Haiku #3

Enjoy the small things
The warm urinal splash-back
But please wash your hands

Everyone's a Critic

So I was checking out Rolling Stone's website (which, incidentally, is a perfect example of print media's quality trumping that of the web's) and I stumbled upon yet another cog in the U2 media machine: an "article" in which "musicians" wax "poetic" on the "greatness" that is the U2. Now I'm not going to touch on whether or not the U2 is a band worthy of the many laurels that have been bestowed upon it, suffice it to say that clearly they've been doing something right to have been this successful for this long. And I also understand the value of cross promotion; all of the gents pictured below either just came out with new albums or are about to. But I find it hard to believe that their publicists let them submit the following, ultra-inane comments to a publication like Rolling Stone because as much as it's been lambasted over the last few years (okay, decades) it's still fuckin' Rolling Stone, and people read that shit. So without further ado, let the banality begin:

"The only band that I've ever seen, so far, that cares about the music they make."

Does that mean, Mr. Thomas, that fabled rock band Matchbox 20 didn't (doesn't?) care about the music they make? Say it isn't so. And I don't mean that flippantly.

"They don't make a record unless they care about every song that they make."

???

"That Atomic Bomb record I lived with for so long, it really ate me up for a while."

Clearly he's a fan if he can't even remember the whole title of the album. That sure was a Smooth comment, Rob.

Also, in his picture, he looks like he's pooping.




And I was like, this totally doesn't sound like U2, but then I was like, yeah, it totally does. And then Guns n' Roses and Nirvana. I'm not that cool a guy.


It's really easy to pick on Fred Durst. But just look at the guy. He looks like Billy from Grand Theft Auto: The Lost and the Damned. I can't help but feel a little sorry for him, though. Remember when Gore lost in 2000 and he went in to hiding and grew that depression beard? But then he rose from the ashes and made a movie about global warming that won an academy award. He really put it in the pocket. Can we expect the same from Freddy-boy?

Well, he may be closer to realizing that goal than you think. Did you know that Mr. Durst is also a film director? It's true! Here's an except of the Times' Nathan Lee's review of Durst's movie about a little girl that struggles to make the boy's football team:

Worth mentioning is that the movie was directed by the Limp Bizkit frontman Fred Durst. “Dude, give me some of that Hollywood magic music,” one imagines this hard-core rocker, in his capacity as cheesy family-film hack, saying to his (uncredited) composer. “Nah, man, a little more sentimental and sparkly. That’s it! Now put it everywhere, man. Awesome. Work it out, dude, I’m going to lunch.”

Sounds captivating!

Also, the movie is called "The Longshots". Also, it came out last year. Also, it stars Ice Cube. Really.

And finally, in case you didn't comprehend what I said at the top of this post, it's true: Limp Bizkit is coming out with a new album this year.

Here's the link to the Rolling Stone article in case you want to go there and see what other brilliant minds have to say about the U2.

Thursday, March 12, 2009

TCHG Daily Haiku

Today's Daily Circle Hand Game Haiku submission comes from Nathan J. Kaplan.

Circle Hand Game asks,
"Greatest rocker of all time?"
Chris Dane Owens, duh.

Thoughts?

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Chris Dane Owens

Even though this post lags on the heels of this man's greatness, I am sure that I speak for all of us when I say that greatness hath been achieved.

Where's Waldo?

Can you find Waldo?

SO SCARY!!!


WHAT WOULD YOU DO?

I WOULD CRY!
Hey everyone! Check out my pandora radio station. You'll just love it.

Click here to listen
Hi everyone.

I saw this floating around the inter-webs.

Enjoy!

Hello. This is my dog Franklin. He's an English Bulldog. Sometimes he licks my friend's dad's sleeve. He is naughty. I like my dog.
I am excited. I hope it's tight.

You knew this was coming.