Everyone's a Critic

So I was checking out Rolling Stone's website (which, incidentally, is a perfect example of print media's quality trumping that of the web's) and I stumbled upon yet another cog in the U2 media machine: an "article" in which "musicians" wax "poetic" on the "greatness" that is the U2. Now I'm not going to touch on whether or not the U2 is a band worthy of the many laurels that have been bestowed upon it, suffice it to say that clearly they've been doing something right to have been this successful for this long. And I also understand the value of cross promotion; all of the gents pictured below either just came out with new albums or are about to. But I find it hard to believe that their publicists let them submit the following, ultra-inane comments to a publication like Rolling Stone because as much as it's been lambasted over the last few years (okay, decades) it's still fuckin' Rolling Stone, and people read that shit. So without further ado, let the banality begin:

"The only band that I've ever seen, so far, that cares about the music they make."

Does that mean, Mr. Thomas, that fabled rock band Matchbox 20 didn't (doesn't?) care about the music they make? Say it isn't so. And I don't mean that flippantly.

"They don't make a record unless they care about every song that they make."

???

"That Atomic Bomb record I lived with for so long, it really ate me up for a while."

Clearly he's a fan if he can't even remember the whole title of the album. That sure was a Smooth comment, Rob.

Also, in his picture, he looks like he's pooping.




And I was like, this totally doesn't sound like U2, but then I was like, yeah, it totally does. And then Guns n' Roses and Nirvana. I'm not that cool a guy.


It's really easy to pick on Fred Durst. But just look at the guy. He looks like Billy from Grand Theft Auto: The Lost and the Damned. I can't help but feel a little sorry for him, though. Remember when Gore lost in 2000 and he went in to hiding and grew that depression beard? But then he rose from the ashes and made a movie about global warming that won an academy award. He really put it in the pocket. Can we expect the same from Freddy-boy?

Well, he may be closer to realizing that goal than you think. Did you know that Mr. Durst is also a film director? It's true! Here's an except of the Times' Nathan Lee's review of Durst's movie about a little girl that struggles to make the boy's football team:

Worth mentioning is that the movie was directed by the Limp Bizkit frontman Fred Durst. “Dude, give me some of that Hollywood magic music,” one imagines this hard-core rocker, in his capacity as cheesy family-film hack, saying to his (uncredited) composer. “Nah, man, a little more sentimental and sparkly. That’s it! Now put it everywhere, man. Awesome. Work it out, dude, I’m going to lunch.”

Sounds captivating!

Also, the movie is called "The Longshots". Also, it came out last year. Also, it stars Ice Cube. Really.

And finally, in case you didn't comprehend what I said at the top of this post, it's true: Limp Bizkit is coming out with a new album this year.

Here's the link to the Rolling Stone article in case you want to go there and see what other brilliant minds have to say about the U2.